Going All Kierkegaard On You
- Jan 1, 2016
- 2 min read
At the expense of sounding like a drama queen, I can’t help but feel as if I’m experiencing an existential crisis. Maybe it’s that dreaded 60th birthday and/or my children flying the nest that I’ve begun to question the very foundations of my life and what my value and purpose is. To be honest, it’s damn scary. I know it sounds pathetic, but it is real. Sure, I have much to be thankful for, healthy kids, loving wife and roof over my head. Nevertheless, something is amiss and I can’t get a handle on it.
Guys like me typically spend the most productive times of their lives focusing on what the family needs. That’s not a bad thing. But what is a bad thing is putting your own introspection and psychological needs on the back burner. It starts with periodic uneasy fillings and anxiety. These feelings pick up in frequency until one day they smack you right between the eyes. It’s that oh shit moment, the epiphany that you are without direction, purpose and passion. And what makes this situation even direr is the absence of an impartial sounding board to help you navigate these rough waters. What the Hell, just someone who can get you to believe again in your value would be great.What makes this situation particularly troubling is the world and economy we are living in is not our father’s world. Continued economic disruption and change has made the ground we stand on feel like Jell-O. If we want to chart a new course, what is the destination? Is setting a destination even plausible given there is a high chance that the destination will evaporate during the journey. Maybe it’s not about a destination as much as it is about being true to certain values. Values?, I need to make a living! You start to admire the young millennial working at the coffee shop with her independence and assumed freedom. The young woman selling handmade leather messenger bags on Etsy from New York City becomes your idle. You begin to bristle with the constant negativity and attacks on the various media channels, from both sides of the political aisle. If I were in better shape, I’d just start running and never stop.
For guys like me that feel the pang to chart a new life’s course, there’s some very heavy lifting that has to precede the contemplated journey. This heavy lifting is between the ears and it relates to building a positive attitude, self esteem, a deep understanding of who we are as individuals, and the courage to take risks and stand up to the inevitable cynics that surround us. Bottom line, we need to be a little selfish for once in our adult life.
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